Eyebrows, sweat and dumbness.

I did a dumb thing the other day.  I went into Tanika’s room for a reason which I no longer remember.  That wasn’t the dumb part.  While there, I noticed a magnifying mirror sitting on her desk.   I decided to look directly into it while the sun illuminated my face.  That was the dumb thing.  This was not an everyday ‘large print’ type mirror.  I think the magnification was measured in exponents.  My pores looked like craters.  My chin and upper lip hairs?  I almost combed them.  I had been putting off taking care of my eyebrows for quite some time – it’s one of my least favorite things to do.  I decided right then and there it was high time to locate a tweezer.  That’s how infrequently I attend to this chore – I had to first find the plucking apparatus before I could begin.  I found one in Tanika’s bathroom.  I don’t know what she uses it for, as I know she doesn’t pluck (lucky duck!).  With the assistance of the sun’s natural brilliance shining in the window, I began the daunting task.  With the aid of the magic mirror, I was quite sure I was yanking out handfuls of hair.  And each one looked a good 2 inches long.  No kidding!  It was quite a time consuming process.  After I cleared what seemed to be an appropriate area along the brow bone, I looked into a ‘regular’ mirror.  That was dumb thing #2 — waiting until I mowed it all before checking to see what the eyebrow would look like to the natural eye.  All I can say is that I won’t have to pluck again for quite some time.  There was almost nothing left.  Switch to magic mirror and it appeared that I had a sufficiently filled in brow.  Switch back to ‘ala naturelle’ and I’ve got bald eyebrows.  I debated on what I should do with the 2nd eye and decided to give it the same style.  I figured it would be less noticeable (although more painful) to have matching brows then to have one stray bush and one thin blade of grass.  I’ve never used an eyebrow pencil before, but I’m never too old to start.   And considering the heat, the less hair on the body the better.  Right?

Since I’m confessing dumb things, let me get it all out at once.  I am back to working out regularly.  I’ve been back at it for less than 3 weeks now, but it’s a start.  That’s a smart thing.  Its good to know that if one is exercising in this climate to do so as early in the day as possible.  Though ‘cool’ is relative, it’s still cooler in the house at 7am then it is later in the day.  Our family room drops to a nippy 90.  Prime time for exercising is as soon as the kids are at school.  Though we turn our AC off as soon as we get up, if we keep the door closed the room will retain some coolness.  One would think the remains of an artificially cooled room would be motivation enough to work out first thing.  Somehow, however, I manage to effectively procrastinate and before I know it, it’s 2pm and I’ve yet to do one squat or lunge.   That’s dumb thing # 3.  By this time the ‘cool’ room is 89 degress.  Also by this time, I’ve been sweating for several hours and I begin to wonder if I really need to work out – considering the sweat and all.  Then I stop rationalizing, accepting the fact that in this weather sweating can be accomplished by something as strenuous as, lets say, breathing.    This poses the next problem… getting spandex/cotton/stretchy work-out clothes onto an already sweaty body…dumb thing #4.  This could easily be avoided by working out as soon as I wake up and before I start the day’s sweating. I can only say that to get the Lycra onto the right places I am required to contort myself in ways I wouldn’t even consider doing during my workout.  So by the time I’m ready, I’ve already had my workout.  Enough said.  Tomorrow I plan to be smarter.

One thought on “Eyebrows, sweat and dumbness.

  1. WOW! Joel had a unibrow when he was 15 and decided to take the matter into his own hands. Kristine and I had offered to help him when we noticed it filling in but he thought plucking sounded painful. So he let it continue to overgrow his browline. One day he emerged from an extended stay in the bathroom where he had a face to face meeting with Jeff’s electric beard trimmer. He had ran it between his eyes. One eyebrow was 1/2 an inch and the other was about an inch. He was way off center. The long one still hung over his nose!! About a month later when it has mostly filled back in I took him for a WAX job at a local Salon. He teared up with every yank. It took almost an hour. I don’t know how he maintains the plantation. I only wish I had taken pictures!!

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